This year, my parents and my in-laws celebrated 55 years of togetherness. Well, 50 went by five years ago, I could have written this then. Or 60 is coming in five years and I can write it then. But I choose to write today so don't ask why now...
Fleeting, lasting, deep, light, amusing, thought-provoking... All that I encounter.
Sunday, May 29, 2016
Saturday, May 14, 2016
Better Quality of Life - And the Price
The tiger walked at a leisurely pace, unmindful of a jeep right behind it, dogging its steps. The people inside were enthralled to catch a glimpse of this majestic creature, truly the king of this jungle. The king couldn't care less. He was busy marking his territory as the rains on the previous days must have washed off his scent sprayed earlier.
But this made me wonder - how much territory did the tigers really have to divide amongst themselves? All they need - any animal needs - is forest land and trees. Food and shelter... That's all.
But this made me wonder - how much territory did the tigers really have to divide amongst themselves? All they need - any animal needs - is forest land and trees. Food and shelter... That's all.
Sunday, May 8, 2016
One Earth: No Clean Slate: A Short Story
One Earth: No Clean Slate: A Short Story: Gods pondered, looking at the earth. They were dismayed at the non-destructible debris that could be seen everywhere. Their calculations w...
Thursday, April 28, 2016
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
A Different Plane
We waited for all eight of us to assemble for practice. The youngest two of the dancers called in sick. The rest of us looked at each other in dismay as the program was just a week away, and we had learnt this item just two days back. But, well, we assured ourselves, there was at least a week. So we had hope.
As we finished the rehearsal for the day and chatted up, the topic of the girls being unwell came up. We wondered if they would get better by the program date, and someone suddenly said, “Oh come! You have done it. I am sure they can too!”
Friday, April 22, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 20
Read the previous chapter here
My head reeled. He pulled me up and took me in his arms. “She
thinks that you will never take this…relationship forward.”
I pushed him away. “Are we to marry to prove her wrong?” I asked,
feeling a stirring of a slow rage within me.
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 19
For the previous chapter, click here
I sat puzzling over his last words. Had he said Shivani? Had he
meant Vandana?
I took my car out and drove to his house. I couldn’t stand the
suspense.
He was surprised to see me there but let me in. I quickly glanced
around to see her presence, or the evidence of her presence. It looked every
inch a male bastion. It should have been reassuring, but it was not. I turned
to look at him. “What did you say?”
Saturday, April 9, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 18
For the previous chapter, click here
Gautam was as if he had been released from prison. There was no
holding him back.
Enjoying his new found freedom and making up for lost time, he
started travelling often. I saw less and less of him. He had plans for every
weekend, and he was busy reviving contact with his friends. He asked me to join
him sometimes, but not always, and never hard enough for me to accept. I was
relieved, in a way. Dobie was a big reason, but, I could have done something
about it.
Thursday, April 7, 2016
The Bucket List
A fancy house.
A luxury car.
Expensive jewellery. Well, make that just jewellery.
Fancy holidays to exotic destinations.
Best education for children.
Latest fashion.
Fun all life.
A luxury car.
Expensive jewellery. Well, make that just jewellery.
Fancy holidays to exotic destinations.
Best education for children.
Latest fashion.
Fun all life.
Saturday, April 2, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 17
Read Chapter 16 here
What stopped me from contacting him? Pride, of course! Every time
my fingers lingered over his number, I withdrew them quickly. I did not want to
sound desperate, all the more because I was
desperate.
And, then the glance they exchanged, the emotions they revealed!
That moment, those two faces… I shook my head to dislodge the memory. But it
wouldn’t go away. I couldn’t forget the way the two had looked at each other –
her eyes… That expression! That eagerness!
I swallowed, my heart fluttering.
Tuesday, March 29, 2016
Who Is She?
He loves her, for in
her womb was he carried
He ravages her, when threatened
by her mind free
He disdains her when
there is no more life to be seen
From birth to death so is she seen
As the mother or the
mother-to-be
Her boon and bane it
shall be
For her womb defines her
identity.
Friday, March 25, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 16
Click here for the previous chapter
Gautam left at around 10. We were chatting on Whatsapp, reviewing
the dinner, when he suddenly vanished for a long while. Just as I went to bed
at 11.30, he messaged, “Mother unwell. Taking her to hospital.”
She passed away later that night. The funeral was to be the next
day, by afternoon after his uncles reached from different cities.
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
The 'Un-Holi' Crime
The concrete jungle in
the desert city of Abu Dhabi sprang to life as the lights came on. Sabina,
nearly at the end of her shift, reached Room No. 724 in the hotel she worked,
pushing her trolley ahead of her. She quickly and efficiently pulled out the
cleaning liquid, new set of bedsheets and pillow covers and opened the door.
The room was dark and stuffy. She smelled something, but could not say what it
was. It made her uncomfortable. She inserted the key in the slot and entered
the bathroom. She saw red spots on the floor and paused, feeling tensed.
She stepped back and
noticed the floor. The stains led up to the bed. She saw the prone figure,
swathed in blood. She let out a scream and ran out, not stopping till she was
in the manager’s cabin. She was inconsolable, and the effort of keeping herself
together seemed to have exerted her beyond her capacity at that moment. She
fainted.
Friday, March 18, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 15
Click here to begin at the beginning
Click here for previous chapter
Shiv was out before I woke up the next morning and returned late in
the night. Before I could ask him if he had had dinner, he banged his room door
shut. Amit followed soon after and was gentler. He even sat with me and told me
about his day. Taking Gautam’s advice, I tried hard not to think of this
difficult matter and maintain a calm front. Dobie seemed to sense the anger in
the air and was sulking, not responding to Amit’s invitation to sit by him.
“What’s with him?” Amit asked edgily.
“Dobie,” I called out softly. He turned his face to the wall. “He
is behaving like the two of you,” I couldn’t help commenting.
Friday, March 11, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 14
For those who came in late, the short serial Dobie and Me begins here
Click here For Chapter 13
“How did it go?” Gautam asked me on the phone later in the
evening.
I started crying. “Bad,” I whispered.
“Do you want me to come over?” he asked softly. But I knew his
mother was not doing well and he had to be home. Also, I didn’t want my sons to
see him right now. They were out, but I expected them back anytime.
“No,” I said hoarsely.
Saturday, March 5, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 13
Read Chapter 12 here, if you missed it
Telling my sons was not easy. Shiva looked dazed and Amit… Oh my poor boy! He couldn’t speak. I felt miserable as I watched them struggle with the news. “How, what? What are you saying?” Amit asked.
Telling my sons was not easy. Shiva looked dazed and Amit… Oh my poor boy! He couldn’t speak. I felt miserable as I watched them struggle with the news. “How, what? What are you saying?” Amit asked.
“I know it is not easy for you, Amit, Shiv…”
“It is our age to have girlfriends, not yours to have a
boyfriend!” Shiv burst out, leaving me baffled. “You have us! Aren’t we
enough?” he asked and started crying.
Friday, February 26, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 12
Read Chapter 11, if you haven't yet
Dobie was snoozing. He barely opened his eyes when we entered, and
went back to his beauty nap.
I cleaned his dish and put some fresh food in it. Gautam joined me
in the kitchen and I started making coffee without asking. He placed the cups on
the counter and added sugar. I brewed coffee. The silence hung between us. I
was immensely disappointed at this transformed man, and uncomfortable when I
caught him staring at me.
Finally, I turned to face him, though uncertainly.
Friday, February 19, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 11
(Click here for Chapter 10)
“Who is he, ma?” Amit asked when Shiv, he and I sat down for
dinner that night.
I knew who he meant, of course, but I stalled. “Who?”
“Gautam, the man who was here this morning…”
“Who was here this morning?” Shiv asked, not taking his eyes off
his phone.
Friday, February 12, 2016
Dobie and Me - Chapter 10
Read Chapter 9 here
The house seemed fuller, and emptier, when my sons visited me. There
was much noise when they were around, much laughter, teasing and fights. Much
love.
And then, when they went off to meet their friends, I felt the
silence pressing against me.
Their timings were uncertain, as usual, putting me in a bind. I
had to accept that they were adults and had to have a life of their own. I
tried to resume mine, but a sort of lethargy set in and I stayed in the limbo –
neither able to work nor meet friends, nor enjoy the holidays completely.
Sunday, February 7, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 9
Read Chapter 8
When I met him a month later, he laughed on hearing of my exploits.
“Is that your idea of life?” he asked snidely. “Ok, for the first month it is
okay… Let’s see how you fare the coming month…”
“What do you want from me!” I asked exasperated. “You mocked me
for not going to a movie or shopping! And now that I tell you I did, you still
mock me!”
“Me? It is not what I want from you! It is what you want from you,
from your life!” He leaned forward. “Tell me, did you enjoy yourself?”
Saturday, January 30, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 8
Read Chapter 7 here
The carefree college days, where all that mattered was bunking
classes, the hours spent in canteen, going to movies, shopping… Shankar and I
drifted close. Soon we drifted away from others, I a shadow of him, he leading
me to new worlds.
One world he led me into was that of college elections. He
campaigned for Pratyush, our senior. We were sophomores and Pratyush was doing
his first year post graduation. Pratyush and I rarely spoke to each other,
except when he wanted to give me some instruction. But he never failed to greet
me, even after he won the elections and became the president. Shankar, though,
became Pratyush’s understudy and spent much time with the ‘men in power’. I
complained, but it fell on deaf ears.
Wednesday, January 27, 2016
A Joyous Journey
Life is not a bed of roses
Thorns often poke their noses
Petals wither, thorns dry up
Fragrance dissipates, but we never give up
Thorns often poke their noses
Petals wither, thorns dry up
Fragrance dissipates, but we never give up
Some laughter, some tears
A bit of anger, sometimes fears
Holding hands, walking our separate ways
We have moved forward despite the sways
A bit of anger, sometimes fears
Holding hands, walking our separate ways
We have moved forward despite the sways
Is this the first or maybe the second?
Fifth, could even be the seventh.
How many births, we know not for sureBut let the love flow forever pure.
Fifth, could even be the seventh.
How many births, we know not for sureBut let the love flow forever pure.
In this one life with each other
Let’s live with wisdom together
Let’s share wonderful hours
Let there be joy around us.
On our 16th Wedding Anniversary, Jan 27, 2016
Let’s live with wisdom together
Let’s share wonderful hours
Let there be joy around us.
On our 16th Wedding Anniversary, Jan 27, 2016
Saturday, January 23, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 7
Read Chapter 6 here
A heavy silence hung between us. He caressed Dobie, who rubbed
himself against Gautam’s leg. Realising how affected he was despite the years
that had lapsed, I got up on the pretext of making some more coffee, giving him
time to recover his composure.
When I returned with two cups, he still seemed to be lost in his
past.
“How is your mother now?”
“Well, she has her days. Is under treatment… but it will worsen…”
he shrugged. After a brief pause, he looked up at me and said, “Never hurt your
parents, Mahek. You can never live in peace after that. I wish I had been more
sensitive and paid more attention. But I made the mistake of thinking it was
the usual mother-in-law daughter-in-law problem. I was ashamed of my mother!”
He lowered his and covered his eyes with his hand.
Saturday, January 16, 2016
Dobie and Me - Chapter 6
Click here for Chapter 5
The service guys took a couple of days to get the car cleaned, and
at a hefty cost. I offered to share a part of the payment at least, but Gautam wouldn’t
hear of it, thankfully. With Dobie’s treatment and two sons in college, it
wasn’t easy though I was not hard up.
Gautam dropped in once in a while to see Dobie, and normally
stayed back for breakfast – if he came before leaving for work - or had dinner
if he came after work. We mostly discussed books – I had a big shelf with books
- and travel. But I also gathered that he was divorced, he was in his early
forties, he liked to travel but couldn’t because his mother was unwell.
Friday, January 8, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 5
The day saw me busy cancelling all my plans for the next few days.
I didn’t think I could enjoy when Dobie looked so miserable. A few friends who
also loved Dobie dropped in and cheered him immensely. And me, of course. It
hurt, I could see that. And he moaned a bit. It was with great difficulty he
had even liquids. His face between his paws, he was a picture of misery. Oh my
poor baby!
Tuesday, January 5, 2016
Some Old and New Memories
It was with great apprehension we planned a trip to Delhi and neighbouring cities. Having got used to the hot, hotter and hottest weather of Chennai, having not enough warm clothes even to face the colder temperature, we debated hotly on the need to make the trip. But two school reunions seemed compelling enough to take the risk.
Reunions
Had I continued to live in Delhi, studied in the same school till the end, would I have felt the same way as I did now, about meeting my friends from '86?
I don't know and this line of thought has to be abandoned as speculation that cannot be proved
conclusively. I did leave the first school I studied in half way, and I was immensely thrilled to be reconnecting with my old friends - and even those I had never met in school for they joined later, or our paths seldom crossed even when they were there.
Saturday, January 2, 2016
Dobie and Me: Chapter 4
(Read Chapter 3 here)
I was ready and waiting by nine. I didn’t have Gautam’s number or
else I would have told him to meet me at the clinic, or not bother to come at
all.
I was glad I did not have his number for that very reason.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)