We Are Our Parents

I stand in the kitchen, shouting at my son. "You know the veggies make you grow tall and strong. How can you make me say it to you everyday!"

Flashback to my childhood, and well into teenage. "Please have this beans. It tastes yummy," my parents and siblings would persuade me, unsuccessfully.

"Greens are important for making your hair grow well," I attack my daughter as she crosses her arms and pouts on seeing palak paneer on her plate.

I can even then remember how I was about greens. For a person whose plate would only accept lady's finger and potatoes, I expect a lot from my children!

"Just spend 10 min doing one subject and you will be fine."

Sigh, I wish I had done that as a kid.

I turn on my children, "You will have children just like you!"

My dad smiles at me and says, "I am glad to see your children are just like you, giving you a hard time."

Anubavangal: Jokesum Feedbackum

Anubavangal: Jokesum Feedbackum: ஒரு புத்தகம் படித்தேன் - பீட்பாக் (feedback) பற்றி. எப்படி ஒருத்தரைப்பற்றி கருத்துக்கொடுக்க வேண்டும், அதை எப்படி ஏற்றுக்கொள்ள வேண்டும் என்று...

Paranormal

Energy balls, ghost, spirits... they don't always feature in my conversations, but sometimes they are fascinating topics. There are people who vouch for their presence. My mother-in-law told me years ago that she can sense suddenly something crossing her, but it has never bothered her. Then last week, my sister-in-law said the same thing. A friend has mentioned that she can feel their presence sometimes.

The worst was when my maid suddenly mentioned a death that had happened in one of my neighbouring flats. "There was an old man in that house. He died. Sometimes when I enter that room, I can see him sitting out there."

Then they talked of the house below mine. "My daughter was working there when suddenly she fell on the floor and her eyes started moving up. I called out to her, but she answered in a different voice."

I swallowed. I neither believe nor disbelieve. But sometimes, too much of such conversation can have my imagination galloping. Seeing my face, my maid assured me, "No no. Your house is clean. No spirits here."

I herded the mother and daughter duo out. I was happier not thinking about the presence or absence of spirits in the house.

Anubavangal: Nizhal

Anubavangal: Nizhal: நேற்று ஒரு நடுத்தர வயதான தம்பதியரை சந்திக்கச்சென்றிருந்தேன். அவர்களுடன் பெசிக்கொண்டிருந்தப்போழுது சில பழைய நினைவுகளை அவர்கள் பகிர்ந்துக்கொண்...

The Mind Filter

It is strange,
The mind,
How it filters out
the unpleasant.
Remembering only
all that is best.

The past,
when it was
the present
Didn't it have,
of downs and ups,
its own share?

The future
which is
the present
throws a light
making the past
glowing and bright.

The songs one heard
The jokes one shared
The friends one had
Fights and struggles
Remembered only as
Wonderful days of the past.

Anubavangal: Agatthin Azhagu

Anubavangal: Agatthin Azhagu: அவன் நடந்து வரும்பொழுதே ஒரு தனி கம்பீரம் தெரிந்தது. தன்னையும் அறியாமல் அவள் மனம் அவனிடம் ஈர்ந்தது. காட்டிக்கொள்ள கூடாதென்று அவள் தன் குரலை க...

Throwing Baby with the Bathwater

A year ago, when I was doing the book on Tiruvannamalai, I met weavers from Aarani, a place famous for silk. The chief weaver's wife proudly told us that her children were studying for engineering. Most of the next generation is now moving away from weaving. Who will carry the tradition forward, I asked. "Those who can't study, will," she said smiling.

I have heard of the Kanchipuram weavers struggling but never given it much thought.

In a recent interview with a leading textile shop owner, he mentioned a few things. The art of making Madurai sungudi is completely lost. "Earlier, women would do the tie and die during leisure time. But now, with TV taking up all that time, no one has the time to spend on this. Now what you find is only block prints."

He mentioned that the present day weavers could not produce very fine cotton weaves. Then he leaned forward and said confidentially, "Education for children is important. But in earlier days, the entire family would be involved in weaving. The children would learn from their fathers from a young age, helping them with small jobs then graduating to bigger ones. It was a way to build knowledge base and learn the nuances of the weaving skill. Today, that is getting lost."

It set me thinking. And then, another conversation with another weaver, and I am really wondering. This man has been weaving for the last 30 years. He says, "The government does not support weaving the way it does agriculture. As a result, we earn very less, and pay very high interest rates. We are unable to innovate or improve our equipment and techniques. People left this trade in the 90s and now don't want to come back because they earn better in the construction industries. Those who remained are those who know no other skills."

I remember another man I spoke to, who had pointed out that slums get created when local industries fail and people migrate to cities hoping to find livelihoods. Mr. Kughanathan of Geocare, who said this, has tried to identify local resources to provide alternative livelihoods in their own native villages.

My two bits on this. Basic education is important. But again, does one size fit all? Are all the engineers productively occupied today? Is it necessary to provide fodder to the engineering and professional colleges by making traditional industries look unattractive and old fashioned? If they are given access to the same facilities and standard of living, will they look out for other professions? Isn't dignity of labour to be valued? Isn't it important to make rural areas as attractive as the cities to live in?

Or, is it asking for too much?