Unhappiness of Happiness

It was night in half the world. There was calm in less than half of the half of the world. For the rest of the more than half, night was day and activity continued unabated - hunting, running, wining and dining. 

Untainted happiness waited with bated breath to follow that calm into the hearts of at least those who had surrendered to sleep. But it found it's entry barred as many dreamers carried the nightmares of the day into their sleep. Fear and anger stood guard, not letting joy even a toe hold at the door of their heart. 

The Fog

They garlanded him. Someone clapped. He bowed with a smile. Looked around at the rest of the people around, still beaming. Someone had tears in their eyes. He patted them on the back. "Such is life," he said warmly. "I go, someone else will come in my place, and so on. Even you will go," he added. 

The person turned away, now sobbing openly. He looked at the person who had garlanded him with a shrug and a sad look, as if to say, he had tried his best.

The Waning Smile

The First Flight in the Last Decade

An 18-year-old boarded the plane with doe-eyed wonder. This was her second time aboard and the first time alone. She felt a little nervous. But since it was a short flight, she felt she could face her fears. She slowly moved ahead, found her place and placed the luggage in the cabin above. She moved to the window seat, excitement slowly replacing nervousness.

A middle-aged man came shortly and sat next to her. Their glances met and he smiled. She smiled back and then looked out. As the flight took off, she felt a tickling sensation in her stomach that made her giggle involuntarily.

"Your first flight?" the man next to her spoke. She nodded and both fell silent. As the flight ascended and stabilized, high winds caused turbulence. The pilot came on air and instructed everyone to remain seated. The small aircraft rattled.

"What do you do?" asked the man next to her as she looked out and ahead alternatively, her heart mirroring turbulence outside. He talked about his daughter and enquired about her family. Short anecdotes peppered the conversation, making her laugh and recollect memories from her own short life. When it was time to land, she wondered at how smooth the journey had become once they started talking. She said gratefully, "I really enjoyed myself. Thank you."

He smiled back and said, "I could see you were scared." The two parted ways after picking up the checked in baggage. He remained but a memory, and a pleasant one. From making friends in trains, now she could make acquaintances in the flight. The world seemed filled with kindly souls.

The Decade After

It was an overseas flight and she was a mature adult handling an important portfolio in a media organization. Soon after being seated in the flight, her laptop came out and she started working on the presentation she had to make to a potential advertiser.

She smiled at the woman who sat next to her and the two nodded. She saw the lady take out a book and got curious. "Which one is that?"

The lady mentioned the title, the author and the two were suddenly in the thick of a discussion about books and movies. They discovered other common interests and were laughing and chatting for the next two hours like friends. 

Yes, she too vanished, but her presence had made time fly! The face will be erased from her mind, but she will forever remember the woman gratefully for some wonderful book recommendations that she had followed up on.

Subsequently

The flight from the US back to India was silent like a tomb. Like some insects chirping here and there, some chatted in whispers. A few children's voices could be heard here and there, sometimes crescendoing to a higher pitch but always dipping back. People now had ear phones plugging their ears or eye patches cutting out light. They had movies and web series downloaded on to their system and they delved into the made up stories with great gusto. Before the flight took off, they made calls to people in remote locations. But there was no interes to be amazed by the people around them, their stories or their unique interests and lives.

She herself preferred to catch up with some work or play card and board games. When it was time to leave the aircraft, she realized she hadn't really noticed who was next to her. Each seat was an isolated box, people right next to each other and yet in worlds apart.

In that long journey, she had barely smiled at another soul in the airports or the flights she had taken. The world had shrunk, but the distance between people had grown.

She sighed and got off the plane, smiling softly to herself as she thought of her family just a few doors away. She would go back to her regular routine, glad to be away from strangers who had nothing to give her or to whom she owed nothing.    

Ravana, the Caring Brother(?)

All Surpanakha wanted was to marry Rama or Lakshmana. Was it right of Rama to have her disfigured? Is that dharmic?

Wasn't Ravana a better character? When she petitioned him, he immediately stood up in her defense and took revenge.

Which is dharma - hurting a woman or supporting one? Who is the righteous one here?

Ripples to Whirlpool

Like the gentle breeze

That rustles up the leaves

Like the gentle rain

That runs down from eaves

The Watch That Stopped

"My watch isn't working. I think it just needs a new battery," 87-year-old Father said to his Daughter. She was stepping out for work.

"What do you need a watch for?" she asked sourly. 

He chuckled. "Don't worry if you are over-worked."

She sighed and smiled, feeling bad already about her irritability. "I will see what I can do about it," she said.

Sat-Chit-Anandam

What do you want? What do I want? What does anyone want? Fundamentally, only to be happy.

And, in essence, what do our Hindu scriptures say? You have the ability to be happy regardless of what you have or you don't. Just be with yourself. Connect with yourself. Know yourself.

We find it difficult? Fine, yes, the mind wanders all over the place, seeking all kinds of pleasures. It rakes up the past and fears for the future. Never mind. Here it is - take what you want, perform these rituals. Go to these temples. Worship these deities... 

What are the deities, really? Discovering the depths in iconography is one of the most beautiful parts of self-discovery. For they are not just someone somewhere doing something. Understanding the significance of these deities helps us understand our own life, feelings, and how to travel through this life.

Lord Siva, for instance, is often depicted in meditation or dancing. Two diametrically different aspects, both helping us connect with ourselves and letting go of the world around us.

Mahavishnu is also often seen as Ranganatha or Padmanabha, reclining in a half-sleep state, dreaming and watching, unruffled or undisturbed, enjoying the projection of dreams, creating worlds, problems, drama and what not. He Himself remains unaffected. And we are the characters in that drama.

When we visit temples, learning the significance of the temple is one simple way to connect with the deity. We can carry our prayers and silently commune with the divine. We can go within ourselves and find our own strengths in the divine presence to find ways to deal with whatever life pushes our way. We can know that whatever may go wrong on the outside, we are still protected and safe if we can but anchor ourselves in the divine, surrender at its feet.

Kanchipuram Varadaraja Perumal Gopuram

And so, when temples become noisy and conversations flow unhindered, I am reminded of a statement by Swami Guruparanandaji in one of his talks - meditation and contemplation need solitude and temples are not for that. Yes, I can see that and I wonder why.

Temples were a social hub in the past. The many praharams gave people space to 'hang out' back in days when the temple and the streets around it bustled with life and were the only go to places to spend time and enjoy. 

But today, we have cafes, malls and what not for that. The overall temple spaces have shrunk. Though outer praharams continue to allow us to let our hair down, as we get closer to the sanctum sanctorum, can't we put the brakes to the wagging tongues and racing hearts? Can't we slowly drop the concerns of the world outside and go into our selves? Can't we leave the stress and the tension behind and find peace and calm? 

Why are we averse to being silent? Does silence scare us? Does it oppress us? Are we afraid to be by ourselves, alone? Are we insecure in our relationships where words are absent? Do we need the constant exchange of words to know it thrives? Can't we just learn to listen to the silence and know everything is right with the world, our world?

Can we learn to experience the Sat-Chit-Ananda in the safety of the temple walls, at least, if not anywhere else?

I wonder what it will take.