Please Skip

Years ago, a friend of mine mentioned a photo she had seen of what human beings will look like in the future. Emaciated limbs and a swollen head because that is the part he will use the most.

According to a Times of India report yesterday, we still are grappling with well-fed bodies - and especially the children. Parents may by gymming and losing weight, but children are still "cute and chubby", to their detriment. Their self-confidence is low, as they are not taken for any school activities, and it is a vicious cycle they get into.

As a dance teacher, I find that when I ask children to jump when doing one of the steps, they don't know what the word means. I demonstrate repeatedly, but their body - not fat, but heavy - refuses to lighten up for the spring action needed to do the step.

While teaching Nagaland folk dance in my children's school this year, we decided to ambitiously teach class 2 and 3 children the bamboo dance. To avoid getting hit by the stick when jumping over it, it requires again that spring action, a certain nimbleness and agility. To my horror, out of the six girls - and again, four not even fat -  only 1 could execute it with ease. One of them didn't know how one jumps, lifting the entire body and tripping, instead of bending the leg at the knee.

According to the Times report, 60 percent of the children do not know to jump... There were other such statistics, but this one, I could so relate to, since I personally see it happening.

I am sure parents are struggling today with heavy schedules - tuition classes, tennis classes, why - even leadership classes. But where then is the time for free play? I remember running, skipping, elastic, hopscotch and the like taking up my evenings. While specific sports maybe good exercise, it is free play that gives us a lot of skills - right from how to manage our time to holistic physical exercise and even interpersonal skills. It is a time when the children are on their own, without parental intervention, dealing with peers in a fun atmosphere. What can replace it ever as a means to learn the basics of life and living?

My current mantra to my students' parents is to get their children a skipping rope. Even if there is no play area, that is a game that is fun, can be played indoors and yet give physical activity for the children.

We need good brains, no doubt. But all work and no play... we know where that one leads to...

The Watery Vacation

It was a weekend of water and birds. Though the birds seem to have gone back and could be seen only in small numbers, just being next to the calm waters, wooded banks and amidst the birds was very relaxing.

Children did get a bit fed up. "Not the same birds again!" they exclaimed... But as the sun started setting, there was much excitement and laughter. The good roads made driving a pleasure in itself.

And then we found the lake with green grass that seemed like a haven away from the bustling city life. Except for the three men who seemed intent on having a drink party in the middle of the afternoon. Though they were quiet, we probably spoiled their mood by going there out of the blue at a time when no one was expected.

Surprisingly, one of the children also felt scared of all the water and wanted to be carried uncharacteristically! But at another spot on the way back home, he managed to perk up and enjoy watching the birds through the binoculars.

What is it about the water that calms one so! The gentle breeze made me wish I could picnic there, thus enjoying the setting a bit more.

More importantly, I am so glad to have journeyed to these places. Calm is never very far if we take the trouble to get away from our routines. It was also heartening to note that there are places where nature still has a sway.

Mee on TV

A thillana, 8 minutes long, by five of us, on Jaya TV at http://www.dailymotion.com/swf/video/xnw8n4

A proud moment.

Amusement Park

Two families went to an amusement park in Chennai. The group consisted of three under 10s and four around/over 40s. The latter was above (read: too scared, too sick) to take most of the rides. The under 10s couldn't go to many, or were dragged away because the elders didn't want to accompany.

Cut to a week later, one of the adults rides her bike on city roads and wonders why we have amusement parks. The bumpy roads give enough jolts befitting a dragon train. The vehicles around simulate dashing cars and Arabian Nights ride where the cups and saucers manage to miss each other by a hair's breadth. The heart is always in the throat as we navigate through these chaotic roads.

The only thing missing is the enjoyment factor. If we can convince ourselves that being dropped down from the skies is fun, then why not this! It's all in the mind, baby!

Anubavangal: Thayakkangal

Anubavangal: Thayakkangal: தாய்மை என்றாலே தயக்கங்கள் தான். நாம் எடுத்த முடிவு சரியா? நாம் சொல்லும் அறிவுரை சரியா? நாம் கோவிப்பது சரியா? நாம் விட்டுக்கொடுப்பது சரியா? ...

A Game of Elastic

Suddenly, I remembered this game I used to play as a kid. I realised that I had played this when under 13, in Delhi, but never in Calcutta. And yet, it had kept me occupied even when I was alone, using two chairs to place the elastic around.

It seemed like a new game to teach my daughter and her friends. But, I didn't remember it properly. So I went on the net, very sure that it would be impossible to locate anything on this.

To my amazement, I discover that it is a game popular in China, and there are several videos in Youtube - not only of children playing, but even adults, and not only Chinese, but even Caucasians. There is one of three ladies from New Zealand - it brought my heart to my mouth. It is played differently from what I remember, and also called Chinese Jump Rope. There are multiple levels, the elastic being pushed up from the ankle to the calf, knee, hip and waist levels. Our complication seemed easy enough when compared to theirs - they try to jump over the elastic at all levels! All we had to do was to cross the elastic without any part of our body touching the rope!

In the evening, I met a neighbour  who had spent her childhood in Delhi, and was thrilled that she had played it too. I think between us, we will be able to revive the game!

Interestingly, in one of the videos, someone had posted, "An attempt to preserve an old game that is dying because of the media!" My thoughts exactly.

Wishes for The Festive Season

Somehow, if one were to place a year on the balance, the months from August starts weighing down. There is an excitement as Ganesh Chathurthi sets the tone for festivities to begin.

Navaratri, Diwali and then a quieter Karthigai followed by bright lights again for Christmas and Pongal.

And then it dips again in Feb-Mar, to peak again in April for the entire country to celebrate the Indian new years. May-June are passable, exciting only for the summer vacation.

Though July has its own festivals to boast of, it still seems like a gloomy month. August and Sri Jayanthi and Avaniavittam sort of remind one that any moment now, the celebrations will begin again.

Is it the weather, the bright lights, the Navaratri visits and the general bonhomie? Is it the new clothes, the promise of sweets, the off days that add to the fun?

Here is wishing everyone a happy festive season... 

Anubavangal: Jokesum Feedbackum

Anubavangal: Jokesum Feedbackum: ஒரு புத்தகம் படித்தேன் - பீட்பாக் (feedback) பற்றி. எப்படி ஒருத்தரைப்பற்றி கருத்துக்கொடுக்க வேண்டும், அதை எப்படி ஏற்றுக்கொள்ள வேண்டும் என்று...

Asterix - Timeless Magic

Picked up one after a long time. Asterix and The Banquet... Despite the distractions of family life, enjoyed the puns immensely. "Why are thanking him. It is we who took him on a ride," says Obelix, literally and figuratively as the duo hijacks a boat a Gaul is holidaying in, in Nice, and Obelix rows it like an express.

"I am not fat! I have a powerful physique, that's all" he protests. That's a good line we can use :)

And the names, of course - Unscupulous, Nervus who runs a breakdown service, Cesar Drinklikafix who runs a pub...

While most comics have great nostalgic value though we tend to outgrow, this is one that anyone from teens to old age can enjoy. I think very young children may miss the puns.

Here is to Asterix.

One Earth: The In-Built System

One Earth: The In-Built System: "A trip to the zoo yesterday was very fulfilling. For one, we seemed to have gone at the right time - when all the animals were out in their ..."

Meeravin Mudal Prayatnam: Vandalur Uyiriyal Poonga - Oru Anubavam

Meeravin Mudal Prayatnam: Vandalur Uyiriyal Poonga - Oru Anubavam: "பல அனுபவங்கள் என்றே சொல்லலாம். இன்று, பல வருடங்களுக்கு பிறகு என் குழந்தைகளுடனும் கணவனுடனும் வண்டலூர் உயிரியல் பூங்காவுக்கு சென்றேன். சில உண்..."

A Trip to The Zoo

The "hot" favourite cooling itself off

A plan abandoned demanded that a better plan replace it.

We had thought of attending a car rally, and skipped breakfast, decided to have brunch so that food was out of the way. But then we decided that it seemed pointless going all the way to see probably only the start of the rally.

But by then the children were getting ready, and it seemed cruel to not take them everywhere. Our guilt was more than their disappointment, but well, it was an excuse for us to go out together after a long while.

I have always wondered why we end up going to closed up spaces like malls for diversion. And yet, all I could think of was the Fun City in Express Avenue. But my hubby had a better plan - the Zoo. A trip that would be of interest to all of us.

Amazing that my 7 and 5 year old children managed to walk all the way. They were tired, they cribbed, they cried, they tripped - can I blame them. The entire thing took up five hours in peak afternoon, with very few stalls in between for refreshments. And yet, they completed the circuit.

In fact, my son amazed me when, towards the end, he suddenly had a burst of energy as we approached the section with crocodiles. Is that his favourite animal? I wonder. He ran ahead, announced the names after checking with us, and was generally in high spirits. He wanted very eagerly to see a rhino, which seemed missing in the zoo here. But a hippo, and a pygmy hippo that responded to his call by looking up while ignoring the others, more than made his day.

My daughter followed and the two were as if they had just entered the zoo.

Ending the day with ice creams sort of made up for all the hard work. Especially when, on returning, their father let them both play on the computer for half an hour, and then TV, she said "This is my best day!"

I agree, it was the best day in a long time.

Also read: Keeping a Promise, Leisurely Journey

Meeravin Mudal Prayatnam: Ennudaiya Bike

Meeravin Mudal Prayatnam: Ennudaiya Bike: "அதற்கு என் மேல் என்ன கோவமோ தெரியவில்லை. பத்து வருடமாக உன்னுடன் இருக்கிரேன், நீ புதுசாக வந்த பழைய காருக்கு முக்கியத்துவம் கொடுக்கிறாய் என்று ..."

Back to My Fav Topic

A chance interview with a neighbour - on what constituted entertainment. And I became nostalgic. Friends, relatives, leisure, games, sports.

There were the gossips, and the dignified ones; there were those who mingled, and those who didn't; there were those who were active, and those poking their nose where it didn't belong.

But there was a community, a sense of belonging, and the time to interact. There were no cars, commuting took longer, and houses were smaller, barely furnished.

Today, we have many a times more than one car. Our house is beautifully decorated, and rooms assigned for each purpose. But, when guests come, only so many can be accommodated. And only for so long. They are in a rush, we are in a rush. Do we pack more? Is it necessary? Where does it take us? To loneliness and longing for company? And to bitterness that we don't have anyone to share our life with, our joys and sorrows with?

We are modern, yes. But at what cost?

More on this: Giving Time; The Super Eye; Shrinking World;  Leisurely Journey

The Country Bumpkin

When shopping for datacard:

"So...errr... why should I go for 3G?"

"Speed madam, and clarity."

"And the schemes? It is for old people... To talk to their son abroad. Mail exchange and maybe photos."

"Easily madam, video chat means at least 1GB (or was that 1 MB?) so please go for this..."

My mother will freak looking at the rates, I know.
I looked at my husband. "You ask your parents," he shrugged and as I got out to call my dad - not my mom, note - he turned to the salesperson with his own doubts.

I quickly wrapped up the call with my dad as he had just one question: "I can scale it down later no?"

"Yes, yes," and I escaped.

I still can't decide if they should settle for 2G. Will they think 2G-200 crores?

***

To shop for a mobile for me next:

"What is there with Android?" my husband asked smartly. I can see all stars, and the milky way. Or is that Andromeda?

The problem in the throat? Adenoids dumbo.

I peep over his shoulder to look at the fancy mobiles that emerge. "You can video chat with me," my husband points out and I laugh sarcastically. Video fight more like.

3G, front(?) video camera, download applications (huh! what?), check mails...

"We will come back later, after I do a research," my husband tells me as he strides out of the store. Better you than me, I think.

All I wanted to ask was: Sound quality and battery life. Looks like those questions are outdated.

Also on: Automation; The Odd Woman Out

Keeping a Promise

When I last went on the electric train (Leisurely Journey), the desire to do a similar journey and take the kids again was strong. This time, the target was the MRTS or the air rail...which goes over the city.

I also was reading up about Chennai Fort, and was amazed that there was a museum open to the public. So it was a natural desire to make this the destination.

The air rail been here for more than five years - it came up during the previous govt, and I had never been on it. What a loss. Better late than never. From the train one can see the beach at one point, and it passed so close to the Chepauk stadium where the match was going on that we could see the players on the field! Though it was crowded onward due to people using this for reaching Chepauk Stadium to watch the IPL match, it was still an experience.

The Fort Museum - I can't believe that in all the years I have visited Chennai and lived in Chennai, I have never visited this museum. Ironically, I have even visited the fort on work to meet Secretaries of government, but the building (now the secretariat has shifted) was so yuck, so matchboxish, no wonder I never associated it with the British monument.

The museum is no great discovery. But it is very neatly kept, and relics from the British period along with the original wooden model make it a worthwhile visit. It is small, just two floors, and so my two children and my friend's daughter didn't get too bored. Maybe the fact that we fed them just before going in helped too.

There is a St. Mary's Church that was quite and peaceful, with a beautiful garden. I could imagine the 1700 Britain there.

We used a different route to exit the fort and reach the station. And now we saw evidence of the fort ramparts, the greenery and the British architecture. What a tragedy though that Ezhumbur river, which flowed through the fort, is nothing more than a stinking canal.

We returned by train, now quite empty. In the evening sun, the 20 minute journey seemed too short, and immensely "redoable". But Chennai heat had sapped our energies, and I was thankful for the tea my friend - who had come with her family with us - offered.

This trip definitely took me back to the days when we didn't have the taken-for-granted cars and roughed it out in large groups which made us forget the difficulties. The backyard from where we exited took us to places that I had seen from the road but never thought I would ever visit.

What next, my friend and I are wondering. The zoo?

The odd woman out

"You must check out this great store on this road! What wonderful collection!" says one. I smile wanly.

"Hey! I picked this from this place... Just out of the world," another says. I nod, trying to note down the name for future use.

"I always go to this place" enthuses one (in addition to 10 other places, I note mentally) .

"They always have exclusive stuff" gushes yet another (which others also seem to be visiting with equal frequency and picking up similar stuff, I can't help thinking).

Where do I fit in? Shopping - I enjoy having new stuff, but would definitely prefer going back to the days when my mom did it for me. Is it the lack of oxygen, the need to go from shop to shop at a painful pace before picking up one or just wrong wiring. This is just about clothes...handbags, shoes, accessories fare worse as the criticality - and therefore the motivation - to buy is even less.

Some birth defect?

The power of gossip

I remember those nights, when we visited relatives during summer vacations... Women of the house would complete their work for the day and huddle up for a siesta. But that is the time they would catch up on gossip.

As kids, we would be around, not officially part of the group, but yet there, listening in. No one shooed us away.

And, strangely, instead of making us bitchy - okay, it did make us bitchy too - it also taught us rights and wrongs in a way a parent can never teach a child.

Today, we don't like gossip - okay, okay, officially we are above gossip - but we have no means to communicate rights and wrongs to our children, to tell them how to handle different situations. Theory can never work, it was through case studies that these little lessons were passed on. Now we deprive our children of these classes. Are we right, or wrong?

This thought was triggered when a friend of mine called to complain about a close relative of hers. After a minor, common surgery, that relative was kicking up a fuss and her mother was unable to cope. My friend has children of her own, preparing for exams. She cannot step into the relative's mother's role.

But as they thrashed this issue at home, my friend's elder daughter - also a fusspot - learnt a valuable lesson. The pain of having fussy relatives.

Parents can give lectures, and then feel frustrated that their children are not listening to them. A gossip has the advantages of being exciting, indirect, and long-lasting because more than one viewpoint is shared.

Long live gossip.

Where is the time?

Once while interviewing dancer Alarmel Valli (on phone), she mentioned how as children they would travel long distances by bus and walk to attend the programs of senior dancers like Yamini Krishnamurthy, watch the entire show and return late at night. The context we spoke in was different, but I loved the image she created and I could visualise large groups of people of mixed ages walking at night, with not much street lights, but bonded by one purpose, one interest.

I couldn't help wondering...today, streets are well lit, we have personal vehicles - 2-wheelers, 4-wheelers; we have more public transport and more venues even closer to home.

And yet, sabhas are almost empty when shows happen - regardless of seniority of the dancers.

Over the years, we have lost what they had - time. Where does it go? Why does the mundane become more important? Are we less interested in the arts - of any form? Except movies today, nothing else can make us leave our comfort zones to visit a theatre to catch up on a play, a dance performance or a music concert. Our children expect to be entertained or fed as the rare show we attend progresses. We cannot wait for the 10 minute recess between two programs.

Have we lost the ability to appreciate the classical art forms?

What are we passing on to our children?

Leisurely journey

Naadvaibhavam - a musical program by 5000 singers, organised by the Art of Living in Chennai. My mother and mother-in-law were participating as singers. Srikant would be there, of course. My father and father-in-law too. I opted out. Managing two children in an expected crowd of 1 lakh would be a challenge. But as the day approached, I wondered...other young children were participating. Shouldn't my daughter at least witness it? The ambience, energy, the experience...

I decided, and was relieved when a neighbour, Anubha, also expressed interest to come.

Then started the worries from the family. "Are you going to drive that distance? Traffic will be horrible! Parking, impossible!"

But how could I come by the local train - which I was not used to at all - with a 7- and a 4-year old.

But as I took the car out, Anubha said, "I am there, let's give it a shot."

The adventurous spirit raised its head in hope. Kids would love the train. I have company, and my kids are comfortable with her. She is a mother herself...why not.

We did it - took the local train. It wasn't easy since there is no station nearby. We took a train that terminated a station before my destination, so we had to change platforms, trains. Then cross at the level crossing - no overbridge.

When we returned, there was the negotiation with the auto that ended horribly.

But, what I remember and cherish is just the journey back, the cool night breeze as the train speeded, the strangers - women - around, and yet the smile that women share so easily. My daughter sat on some lady's lap near the window though there was enough space around. And though Anubha and I walk every evening in our complex, just sitting down and chatting - transported me back to my college days when we were not bogged down by any cares.

Not that I have cares - but there is always the rush to reach a point and get back home, dinner and lunch to be cooked, kids to be minded...some deadline to be met, or just sometime in front of Facebook...

In the train, with the engine driver worrying about driving the train, no traffic or pollution around, I longed for another such evening to come.

***

My holidays are usually paccckkked. But in Mirvana resort, 55 kilometers from Jaisalmer, even in September, the heat compelled us to be indoors - in-tents. And then the long drive to ride the camel on the dunes...the camel cart ride another day to a village. Such leisure and peace...with just the farms and the greenery around us (for a desert state, there was much too much greenery last september)...Those are the moments that linger in the mind.